You can listen to our shenanigans here
http://thebardisdead.blip.tv/file/4943789/ Part 1
http://blip.tv/file/4943842 Part 2
or download the mp3 files here
http://www.megaupload.com/?d=A1LGJJUH
Monday, 28 March 2011
DND: The Flight of Dragons (Paragon Campaign)
Not much to tell you on what's already happened as there's only been two sessions, in the first session the group were gathered by the Queen Elizabeth to end a possible threat before it arose, this threat was the drow. The drow had never been seen before in the empire so the Queen's worries were valid, the group went to the tower of Hades an insane, not so smart drow who was opening a portal that summoned Lolth to the mortal world, The group fought with all their might but before they managed to knock Hades unconscious, Lolth appeared and shot her dark magic into the sky, covering the empire in a dark cloud which altered it's people. The elven population of the empire were now non existent and replacing them, the mass majority, the drow. With even the Queen now a drow and no memories of the group of their elven lives. Everything to them is normal.
Characters
Hennen- The ridiculous damage dealing ranger
Regden- The Treefling Druid (What's a treefling? A story for another time)
Urist- The Dumbfounded Dwarf Paladin
Arannis- The Last Elf Swordmage
Shamash- The over-dramatic dragon-born
Bardeil- The Birdy Bard
Amun-Ra-The Barbaric Cleric
The session started with the group interrogating Hades, discovering he isn't the brightest bulb of the drow. The reason he created the portal in the first place is because he believed the drow to be weakening in the underdark, to save his people he sought new land and came upon the surface, not really taking consideration of the sun he decided to summon Lolth hoping that she would deem it a worthy new home, however he did not expect her to do what she did last session.
So, the group head out to Athena, the former centre of elven culture, now the centre of the drow culture. Where they came across a crowd forming around the city gallows, where they eye Raz, The Righteous. A drow who bears the symbol of pelor of all deities. Amun-Ra being a worshipper of Pelor doesn't even hesitate to plan and saves Raz, the group managed to talk the guards of the city form taking them prisoner by taking their Lord, Nero hostage.
After releasing Nero the group followed Raz to a cave, where The Order Of Moradin awaited, a group of drow rebellions who worship Moradin and Pelor. Tending to human slaves. Raz explains to te gorup that he plans to build an army, and he's going to need their help to do it and they can start right now.
The Order of Moradin had barricaded themselves in a part of the cave away from Vampires, wolves and a dragon. Raz does not care for the unholy creatures, however the dragon intrigues him and he asks the gorup to try and convince the dragon (If it is an intelligent dragon) to join Raz's crusade against Lolth.
Amun-Ra has no argument against this, however the rest of the group take a while to decide whther it is right or not, seeing as they would be involving themselves in a holy war. Eventually they decide, whatever they do, they will be involved in this war, it is too late to pull out so they may as well start now and head in to confront the mighty dragon.
After battling mighty wolves, slaughtering unholy vampires and saving human slaves, the group confront the mighty dragon and promise him riches, glory, the chance to etch himself in history, the things a dragon needs in life! The dragon is more than happy to accept...
The group decide that now they have a dragon o0n their side, the time to strike should be soon, starting with Athena. With their leader Nero proving to be weak, the city will be in chaos (Drows hate weakness, especially in their leaders and the group have assumed he'll probably be punished) They decide that next session, they will take the dragon and perform an aerial strike on Athena, scaring off any drow fighting for power and hoping that the brave and rebellious drow stay and become a part of their army, also in turn gaining a base of operations.
NOTE:
Flight of Dragons will be uploaded on to youtube or blip and mp3 files will hopefully be downloadable soon. If not the mp3 files, you'll be able to hear the session on either youtube or blip.
Characters
Hennen- The ridiculous damage dealing ranger
Regden- The Treefling Druid (What's a treefling? A story for another time)
Urist- The Dumbfounded Dwarf Paladin
Arannis- The Last Elf Swordmage
Shamash- The over-dramatic dragon-born
Bardeil- The Birdy Bard
Amun-Ra-The Barbaric Cleric
The session started with the group interrogating Hades, discovering he isn't the brightest bulb of the drow. The reason he created the portal in the first place is because he believed the drow to be weakening in the underdark, to save his people he sought new land and came upon the surface, not really taking consideration of the sun he decided to summon Lolth hoping that she would deem it a worthy new home, however he did not expect her to do what she did last session.
So, the group head out to Athena, the former centre of elven culture, now the centre of the drow culture. Where they came across a crowd forming around the city gallows, where they eye Raz, The Righteous. A drow who bears the symbol of pelor of all deities. Amun-Ra being a worshipper of Pelor doesn't even hesitate to plan and saves Raz, the group managed to talk the guards of the city form taking them prisoner by taking their Lord, Nero hostage.
After releasing Nero the group followed Raz to a cave, where The Order Of Moradin awaited, a group of drow rebellions who worship Moradin and Pelor. Tending to human slaves. Raz explains to te gorup that he plans to build an army, and he's going to need their help to do it and they can start right now.
The Order of Moradin had barricaded themselves in a part of the cave away from Vampires, wolves and a dragon. Raz does not care for the unholy creatures, however the dragon intrigues him and he asks the gorup to try and convince the dragon (If it is an intelligent dragon) to join Raz's crusade against Lolth.
Amun-Ra has no argument against this, however the rest of the group take a while to decide whther it is right or not, seeing as they would be involving themselves in a holy war. Eventually they decide, whatever they do, they will be involved in this war, it is too late to pull out so they may as well start now and head in to confront the mighty dragon.
After battling mighty wolves, slaughtering unholy vampires and saving human slaves, the group confront the mighty dragon and promise him riches, glory, the chance to etch himself in history, the things a dragon needs in life! The dragon is more than happy to accept...
The group decide that now they have a dragon o0n their side, the time to strike should be soon, starting with Athena. With their leader Nero proving to be weak, the city will be in chaos (Drows hate weakness, especially in their leaders and the group have assumed he'll probably be punished) They decide that next session, they will take the dragon and perform an aerial strike on Athena, scaring off any drow fighting for power and hoping that the brave and rebellious drow stay and become a part of their army, also in turn gaining a base of operations.
NOTE:
Flight of Dragons will be uploaded on to youtube or blip and mp3 files will hopefully be downloadable soon. If not the mp3 files, you'll be able to hear the session on either youtube or blip.
Sunday, 27 March 2011
My Exploitation Movie Dreams...Crushed
I love exploitation films, not because of the random naked women in every other scene or a lesbian scene that they just HAD to put in there...but because they're hilarious. If some of them were marketed as comedy films, they'd get more profit.
I had the idea, a crazy idea an idea that would never work, to search for a way to contact Reb Brown for an interview, why Reb Brown? Well, my idea of the ultimate Exploitation movie consists of Reb Brown and Pierre Kirby. Pairing the two up in an actionsploitation movie. Think about it! That could have changed their lives forever (Pierre wouldn't be dead for one)
Reb might make it mainstream, he may have been the terminator, and he and Pierre Kirby could have met up once again in terminator 2 with Kirby as the T-1000 (That would so be my favourite film if that was real...)
I found ways of contacting Reb, oh sure, but none that would work. First I discovered Reb is, or was...not sure but they still state of some film production sight (Sundance...sunflower...sunseed, something to do with the sun is what they're calling they're "productions") and Reb is/was the vice president of editing and marketing...helping make such classics as "Pinnochio in the hood"...which will be coming to a video store near you, never.
It just so happened this site allowed me to email Reb, except the email was no longer valid. I then discovered that one site had his address so people could send pictures, posters, whatnot for autographs. However, not wanting to seem like a stalker and the fact that this site had not been updated since 2006 I decided to go against that.
So here I am, left without a Reb Brown to interview or a Pierre Kirby to even look for, I guess the only way my exploitaiton dreams will ever be sated...is to pull a Godfrey Ho!
That's right, cut and paste editing. Reb finds himself stuck in a terrorist plot he didn't want to be a part of, meanwhile in movie B, Pierre is for some reason dressed like a ninja because the very same terrorist organisation has found their way to Japan, the two meet at the end to kick terrorist butt and they walk away in the sunset...awww yeah
Reb Brown...if you ever read this...if you ever come across this...make these dreams come true...it's your obligation as an actor. Relive your roots, Bruno Mattei would want it that way (I'm just spouting off names to you people who have no idea what I'm talking about...)
God Bless Captain America
I had the idea, a crazy idea an idea that would never work, to search for a way to contact Reb Brown for an interview, why Reb Brown? Well, my idea of the ultimate Exploitation movie consists of Reb Brown and Pierre Kirby. Pairing the two up in an actionsploitation movie. Think about it! That could have changed their lives forever (Pierre wouldn't be dead for one)
Reb might make it mainstream, he may have been the terminator, and he and Pierre Kirby could have met up once again in terminator 2 with Kirby as the T-1000 (That would so be my favourite film if that was real...)
I found ways of contacting Reb, oh sure, but none that would work. First I discovered Reb is, or was...not sure but they still state of some film production sight (Sundance...sunflower...sunseed, something to do with the sun is what they're calling they're "productions") and Reb is/was the vice president of editing and marketing...helping make such classics as "Pinnochio in the hood"...which will be coming to a video store near you, never.
It just so happened this site allowed me to email Reb, except the email was no longer valid. I then discovered that one site had his address so people could send pictures, posters, whatnot for autographs. However, not wanting to seem like a stalker and the fact that this site had not been updated since 2006 I decided to go against that.
So here I am, left without a Reb Brown to interview or a Pierre Kirby to even look for, I guess the only way my exploitaiton dreams will ever be sated...is to pull a Godfrey Ho!
That's right, cut and paste editing. Reb finds himself stuck in a terrorist plot he didn't want to be a part of, meanwhile in movie B, Pierre is for some reason dressed like a ninja because the very same terrorist organisation has found their way to Japan, the two meet at the end to kick terrorist butt and they walk away in the sunset...awww yeah
Reb Brown...if you ever read this...if you ever come across this...make these dreams come true...it's your obligation as an actor. Relive your roots, Bruno Mattei would want it that way (I'm just spouting off names to you people who have no idea what I'm talking about...)
God Bless Captain America
Dungeons and Dragons: Oceanworld Campaign
Kevin Costner eat your heart out, we did this shit right. So far in Oceanworld we have acquired ourselves a ship, gathered a bounty, one of us got ripped off by a shipwright, decided to avenge this wrongdoing by burning down the shipwright but failing. Following his stupidity a trial occurred where my Italian, pants removing Bard acted as a lawyer in order to save his ass, unfortunately, although saving him from death, I could not save him from being imprisoned.
We then went in search of tresya! Finding an underwater city full of riches and wonders, Prince Adams (I swear it was Prince Adams, not Darius, the bard at all!) Decided at one point to sacrifice his blood to an altar, bringing a demon out which we luckily defeated and thus, the session began
Characters
Darius Darius- The Italian Bard (Who is not dead)
Kavaki- The Not So Smart Fighter
Azad-The Daring Druid
Adams-The Multiform Barbarian
Ramirez- Rolling his R's like a Rogue
Mika- The Albino Thief
Once we got back to the surface, we looked to the Lady Kika (The woman who hired us for piratey pirateness)
to sell our wares, on the way we discovered that there is something wrong in the air, with nature itself. We managed to sell 2 barrels of fine wine to lady Kika and sought the merchant William de'fort to sell him the rest of the barrels we found (we had 8 left)
We managed to strike a deal with William and then went in search of jobs. We found out about a slaver, Axemoore who has continuously struck town and taken away many women and children. We decided to deal with the problem and organised ourselves in order to lure him out. We thought of using Mika as bait, however therealisation crossed she might have died, so we used Ariel instead, Kavaki's wife
We gathered in the outskirts of the city and sprung our trap and thus the encounter begun! It was a long hard fought battle and sadly we lost Kavaki, the fighter is dead. Axemoore then began to ran awa and at the last minute the druid manned up and hit him with faerie fire just managing to knock Axemoore unconscious at the last second.
Darius being angered by the injustice of Kavaki being killed, bounds,gags,shaves, and tortures Axemoore for answers about the people he sells his slaves to. Three specific names cross Darius' interests, Warren from the navy, Viceroy, a noble from the east and Captain Zin, a pirate.
Ariel, Kavaki's wife joined the party in order to avenge her husband's death and make him proud.Adams then faces a choice, approached by three gods, Moradin, Kor and Trog, where each presents themselves to him and whichever god he chose would be the path he'd follow as he decides to become a Paladin. Darius also goes through a similar choice, presented with two fey creatures giving him the choice to use his amgical knowledge for lawful purposes, or chatoic purposes, Darius chooses lawful
Kavaki, Lest We Forget
Saturday, 26 March 2011
Dungeons and Dragons: Dark Sun Campaign
So last night was our Dark Sun Campaign, apocalyptic DND! What could go wrong? Well so far our group has come across some amulets which will lead us to an arcane group, have fought in an illegal fighting ring (Rule 1: Don't talk about fight club) We've dealt with some random fat lady we found in a cave and by dealt we just dropped her off in a town and did our own business, and in the previous session we were presented with multiple tasks.
List of Characters
Raoul Duke- The Racist Druid
Star Notia- The Token Elf Ranger
Vargach- The Dragonborn Ardent who replaced the Bard
Katho- The Jamaican Bug Monk
Keira- The Token Female Hunter
Trent Damage-The Awesome Damage Dealing Fighter
Theren-Theren is....the silent Warlord
We were told that desert raider's had been bugging the city for quite some time and sooner or later they would leave the city fortress of Altaruk in ruins. We decided to crush these mighty Raider's we needed a mount, a big mount, one that could carry B.A.M (our group name) like a tour bus carried The Beatles. So we sought the help of a weird looking Psion, Lord Elward. Lord Elward deals in rare monsters that can't be found in the local area and it just so happens he also has a farm/zoo of them. Perfectly legal I swear.
I am a druid and my druid being one with nature thought he could talk the Psion into giving us an animal, if we did him a favor. He agreed to it, the favor which we must perform for him, is to find a ring which he had lost in The Underdark.
Well I had no hesitations, going into the Underdark? Full of drows and nutjobs who haven't seen the light of day? Why would that sound the least bit dangerous. We headed to the Underdark and set out to find the ring of the Psion. In the Underdark there were many broken carts and many magic mushrooms, which let out spores which affected us while we were in the Underdark. The bravest of the group ventured forward through the caves, while the pussy elf and Theren decided to wait around for us to return. Did that stop our group from moving on? No it didn't! In fact we moved on so much we encountered a group of stoners. Now if you've ever been a stoner, you know how pissed off you get when your drug party has been interrupted, you're just chilling, smoking some weed, doing some mushrooms. Then suddenly, out of the blue a bunch of guys with swords enter the room wanting to kill you (It's more likely than you think)
Well needless to say these stoners attacked, we dealt with them like men while Theren and Star continued to refuse to join us and because of this, as our search continued, I like to believe Karma was there with us that night as Star got kidnapped by the stoners and taken away to a sacrificial altar where she too would be made a stoner.
Not wanting to lose our friend to drugs, we discovered a secret tunnel, me and my Jamaican bug friend Katho (who you'd think would be on the stoners side...) went through said tunnel while the others went around and slaughtered them in a pincer movement. We saved Star, retrieved the ring, brought it back to the Psion and retrieved a giant fucking lizard which we called Mehdi (You have to know our friend Mehdi, to understand why we named it after him)
BUT not before encountering "The Lord of The Underdark" (whom we didn't see because with him he brings clouds of darkness.) Who warned us that if we ever entered his Underdark again...we would die
Then our session ended with a decision, we recieved our giant mount, we'd gathered some coin from fight club, now we had the raider's to deal with and had to discuss the options. I had thought of pulling off a trojan horse deal where we built a wooden idol that we could hide in and use that to get into the Raider's camp, others were not so keen about that idea. I then brought the idea that we should lure the Raider's to the city and just let a battle unfold between the two (My guy is slowly turning chaotic evil) Again, the group disagreed and the decision we all finally came to, except the stupid elf was to face the raider's head on (apply directly to the forehead)
Star being all noble, as elves like to think themselves to be wanted to help build the towns defense and fight them there. BAH! I do not take the advice of an elf! I AM RAOUL DUKE! I AM NATURE!
List of Characters
Raoul Duke- The Racist Druid
Star Notia- The Token Elf Ranger
Vargach- The Dragonborn Ardent who replaced the Bard
Katho- The Jamaican Bug Monk
Keira- The Token Female Hunter
Trent Damage-The Awesome Damage Dealing Fighter
Theren-Theren is....the silent Warlord
We were told that desert raider's had been bugging the city for quite some time and sooner or later they would leave the city fortress of Altaruk in ruins. We decided to crush these mighty Raider's we needed a mount, a big mount, one that could carry B.A.M (our group name) like a tour bus carried The Beatles. So we sought the help of a weird looking Psion, Lord Elward. Lord Elward deals in rare monsters that can't be found in the local area and it just so happens he also has a farm/zoo of them. Perfectly legal I swear.
I am a druid and my druid being one with nature thought he could talk the Psion into giving us an animal, if we did him a favor. He agreed to it, the favor which we must perform for him, is to find a ring which he had lost in The Underdark.
Well I had no hesitations, going into the Underdark? Full of drows and nutjobs who haven't seen the light of day? Why would that sound the least bit dangerous. We headed to the Underdark and set out to find the ring of the Psion. In the Underdark there were many broken carts and many magic mushrooms, which let out spores which affected us while we were in the Underdark. The bravest of the group ventured forward through the caves, while the pussy elf and Theren decided to wait around for us to return. Did that stop our group from moving on? No it didn't! In fact we moved on so much we encountered a group of stoners. Now if you've ever been a stoner, you know how pissed off you get when your drug party has been interrupted, you're just chilling, smoking some weed, doing some mushrooms. Then suddenly, out of the blue a bunch of guys with swords enter the room wanting to kill you (It's more likely than you think)
Well needless to say these stoners attacked, we dealt with them like men while Theren and Star continued to refuse to join us and because of this, as our search continued, I like to believe Karma was there with us that night as Star got kidnapped by the stoners and taken away to a sacrificial altar where she too would be made a stoner.
Not wanting to lose our friend to drugs, we discovered a secret tunnel, me and my Jamaican bug friend Katho (who you'd think would be on the stoners side...) went through said tunnel while the others went around and slaughtered them in a pincer movement. We saved Star, retrieved the ring, brought it back to the Psion and retrieved a giant fucking lizard which we called Mehdi (You have to know our friend Mehdi, to understand why we named it after him)
BUT not before encountering "The Lord of The Underdark" (whom we didn't see because with him he brings clouds of darkness.) Who warned us that if we ever entered his Underdark again...we would die
Then our session ended with a decision, we recieved our giant mount, we'd gathered some coin from fight club, now we had the raider's to deal with and had to discuss the options. I had thought of pulling off a trojan horse deal where we built a wooden idol that we could hide in and use that to get into the Raider's camp, others were not so keen about that idea. I then brought the idea that we should lure the Raider's to the city and just let a battle unfold between the two (My guy is slowly turning chaotic evil) Again, the group disagreed and the decision we all finally came to, except the stupid elf was to face the raider's head on (apply directly to the forehead)
Star being all noble, as elves like to think themselves to be wanted to help build the towns defense and fight them there. BAH! I do not take the advice of an elf! I AM RAOUL DUKE! I AM NATURE!
Friday, 25 March 2011
I just realised...I have a twitter
I don't know why i'd tell people who will follow(or are soon to follow, or will never follow if that's your tastes) to also follow me on twitter, because my twitter would literally just be linking you back here but fuck it I made it and it's been useless to me so far, it needs to be useful.
My Twitter account:http://twitter.com/#!/TheBardisDead
Follow it...or don't...up to you really
My Twitter account:http://twitter.com/#!/TheBardisDead
Follow it...or don't...up to you really
Dungeons And Dragons: Where Bards go to die
I am not a DND veteran, I'm not even a DND intermediate learner, I consider myself to still be new. A lot better than when I first started mind you. Dungeons and Dragons will probably be something I talk a lot about here, describing the various campaigns and their goings on.
Now for every campaign I'm a part of there's been some progression, so I'm going to link you to where you can see some of our sessions along with some experiments that got "Out of hand" shall we say? We're geeks, we're nerds, our ego's can collide, we can come up with ideas, think they're good and then realise...we're not so good at it, but that's the fun of life right? Trying, I'm not here to please the Internet, I'm here to please myself. (Which I'm already pretty good at.)
To view our DND sessions (if they get uploaded) Go here: http://np3228.blip.tv/
If not, no worries, I'll give as good of a summary I can when each session goes down of what has happened to the current point and then take it from there.
Campaigns going on so far
Alternating Friday Campaigns- Dark Sun, and so far an Unnamed campaign
Alternating Saturday campaigns- Tiefling Future (Hosted by me), Oceanworld
Alternating Sunday Campaigns- DND:Norse, Evil Super Sword Sequel-Paladin Level (Hosted By Me)
Now for every campaign I'm a part of there's been some progression, so I'm going to link you to where you can see some of our sessions along with some experiments that got "Out of hand" shall we say? We're geeks, we're nerds, our ego's can collide, we can come up with ideas, think they're good and then realise...we're not so good at it, but that's the fun of life right? Trying, I'm not here to please the Internet, I'm here to please myself. (Which I'm already pretty good at.)
To view our DND sessions (if they get uploaded) Go here: http://np3228.blip.tv/
If not, no worries, I'll give as good of a summary I can when each session goes down of what has happened to the current point and then take it from there.
Campaigns going on so far
Alternating Friday Campaigns- Dark Sun, and so far an Unnamed campaign
Alternating Saturday campaigns- Tiefling Future (Hosted by me), Oceanworld
Alternating Sunday Campaigns- DND:Norse, Evil Super Sword Sequel-Paladin Level (Hosted By Me)
The Bard Is Dead- Introduction
I believe everything needs an introduction, every good story needs a beginning, a middle and an end, every good film needs the same, everything I pay money for would be good to have something which takes some time to get involved in, otherwise I wouldn't be paying money for it (who do you think I am?)
This is my blog, I am here to share my views on subjects in the world, subjects which interest me, I will not discuss politics or religion because that will just cause a shit storm. No! Here at The Bard is Dead we discuss the important matters! Such as Dungeons and Dragons, Films, Games, Wrestling, anything that comes into my tiny little brain, I'll probably write about it. Hopefully not in too much detail.
In a nutshell I'll talk about anything and everything and I'll do it with a smile, and hopefully, I'll be able to make you smile on the journey. if you have any questions while we go on said journey I'll be happy to answer them.
Strap yourselves in, grab a lute and enjoy the madness, because life's too serious.
This is my blog, I am here to share my views on subjects in the world, subjects which interest me, I will not discuss politics or religion because that will just cause a shit storm. No! Here at The Bard is Dead we discuss the important matters! Such as Dungeons and Dragons, Films, Games, Wrestling, anything that comes into my tiny little brain, I'll probably write about it. Hopefully not in too much detail.
In a nutshell I'll talk about anything and everything and I'll do it with a smile, and hopefully, I'll be able to make you smile on the journey. if you have any questions while we go on said journey I'll be happy to answer them.
Strap yourselves in, grab a lute and enjoy the madness, because life's too serious.
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