GLEE 3D?! ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?

I want to go on record here saying I think Glee is the stupidest idea for a show EVER! I want to go on record saying Glee does the worst covers I have heard in recent times. I want to go on record saying, if Glee is good entertainment these days. FUCK TELEVISION!
Glee is nothing more than high school musical for television with a bit more adult language used because Ohhh it's edgy and it's high school and it'll get the teens attention if we're more edgy. How old are the actors in this show? Seriously? How OLD are they? It's like Harry Potter where I'm pointing at the screen and saying "That's a grown man...that's a grown man right there! That's a grown man right there playing a teenage boy!"
And as for the music? I wouldn't mind them doing Journey, I wouldn't mind them doing Rocky Horror Picture Show, I wouldn't mind them doing Fleetwood Mac, but there's one BIIIIG problem here. THEY FUCKING SUCK!
There's a REASON people don't cover those songs often, because it's fucking difficult. You really think some High school band are going to hit the high notes Steve Perry was able to hit? You REALLY think that they were going to do Journey any favours with their cover?
I respect a band or an artist trying to revive the awesome shit from way back to a new audience, but there's a difference between reviving and murdering.
I won't even dare go into the awfulness that was their version of Rocky horror. If you're going to do Rocky Horror...do Rocky Horror, don't tone it down, down make it "safer to watch" I mean you were broadcasting this shit on TV, so of course that spelt disaster, like the censors were going to let you get away with the sexual stuff that's in Rocky Horror. Do a stage show, do it properly, hell remake the fucking film for all I care it isn't like I'd watch that knowing it was from Glee, but you'd get people going to watch it because it's Rocky Horror and Rocky Horror is awesome.  They'd probably walk out appalled. though, I know I was appalled hearing this shit, go ahead, press the play button....I'll wait.

You finished? You hear that? Yeah, I had to go watch the original after hearing that. I haven't had problems with Glee before I was angry about the songs and Rocky Horror, I just thought it as some overrated bullshit, which people accepted because they were reviving cool stuff and it was probably the only good thing(In their minds) going on TV.

Well you know what, the straw that broke the camel's back came with Glee 3D. I hate 3D concerts anyway, I think it's pointless. Even more pointless than 3D movies, because you take a concert, which seemingly has...no aspects of 3D unless you're actually there, then throw random graphics at the screen, JUST so they have an excuse to give it the 3D gimmick. Without those graphics it's a fucking Glee Concert, a shitty one!

Fuck Glee, fuck the music Glee produces because, it's just killing good songs, well not killing...just, absolutely butchering them and beating them with a stick saying "Is this good? You like this? YOU LIKE THIS!? LIKE IT! LIKE IIIIT!"

and fuck this movie, why do people like this? Was the common sense in entertainment THAT hard to find for you people who like this shit? Is it THAT hard to look at this and just admit...this is shit. This is shit, it's always been shit and will always be shit as long as it keeps doing what it's doing. There's good singers there, there's good talent there, but the shit they're doing just tarnishes that. Do something original Glee, or get the fuck off my television, get the fuck off my radio and stay the FUCK out of my movie scene.

DND Norse: The Roleplaying Session

NORSE MYTHOLOGY BOW TO THE MIGHT OF THOR, FALL TO THE TRICKS OF LOKI! With the shenanigans our group gets up to, you can imagine the buttfuck our characters have suffered.

Here is what you've missed so far:
The group has been assigned on a mission by the gods, the gates of hell are opening and that's no good. Therefore we must travel to the southern most plane in order to get the key to the gate of hell, then we must travel back to the northern most plane to ensure the gates remain closed. So far the group has killed a chieftan, met a Necromancer, killed him too, whose soul has now split up amongst the group members as curse marks. We encountered cultists of the goddess Dis (spelling? I'm not good with my Nordic gods) who just so happens wants to bone Captain Erevan, the creepy elf man who does not approve of your bullshit. Turns out she's wanted to bone him for a while and Erevan...well he hates the gods so he doesn't find this to be the best experience. After being locked away and forcing our sword-mage into performing lesbian sex in order to persuade a lesbian cultist to free us, or at least not kill us. Lucky for us, Dis wanted to fuck with her own followers and helped us escape to her tower so we could see her. There, we encountered Rose (a.k.a. Giggles) whom Jekyll (The Drow Assassin Nymphomaniac with a split personality) took a liking to her and from that moment swore he would take her wherever he went. Dis teleported us to the northern most plane where we got the key.

And Now Our Scheduled Story...

We awoke where we began the campaign, in the middle of a big field in our magical shack of magicness (given to us by the magical gods....magic) There we decided, seeing as we had the key it was time to head to the north. The next northern plane was The home of the dark elves. Jekyll, being a drow who can't remember much of his past is happy to go there. We decided the best...and worst place to go would be the tower of the Necromancer we killed..

On the way to the Necromancer's tower we encountered a ghost storm, full of spirits whom, if we called out to and asked a question, they would answer with a riddle. Jekyll called out to the Necromancer, in response he heard the Necromancer's laugh and his legs altered in appearance to that of a goats. Garth, the spanish artist formerly known as a bard (who had not died) decided to do the same, he grew horns. We then decided the best person to call out to the necromancer was Giggles, what we didn't expect (which is what happened) Was that giggles' stomach would explode, we would be covered in blood, and sitting before us would be a baby drow. Now the group at first thought that Jekyll had his way with her (now that may have been true, but we won't go into that.) The baby however upon further religious and arcana checks had traces of all of us and was neither male, or female. This lead us to suspect that it may be a god. Jekyll then decided to call out to spirits of drow to find out a way to their realm. The person to respond was the soul of his alter ego, Hyde. Who simply told him, the only way was through death.

We discovered later in the session this was partly true, in order to get to the drow realm, we had to get a magical drow blade, and stab ourselves in the heart, we would then be transported to the drow realms. So we entered the necromancer's tower in search of the magic dagger hoping he would have it, he did but boy did it take a while to get to it. Our curses began to affect us more and more physically and we soon realized if we stayed here too long, they would most likely cause us to become complete monsters. After thorough searching, gathering a key and finding a magical bookshelf that was a hidden door. Jekyll went through every book on the shelf to find that within each book there was a key. After finding the right book, he placed the key into the book and the secret door opened. The group grabbed what treasures they could and booked it from the tower. Luckily one of the treasures we grabbed was the drow blade.

We all stabbed ourselves in the heart, the baby teleported with us with his/her/it's magical powers and we arrived in a dark forest, the realm of the drow. Jekyll's home. Upon his return to the place he had forgotten about he hears spirits whisper to him and his companions and they embark on an encounter. We fought away the tree spirits and all that remained were the kind spirits of the trees, whispering of "The return of the Prince" and embracing Jekyll and the group to hide them away from oncoming guards. The group tried to remain stealthy, but unfortunately we were unsuccessful. Jekyll, not wanting his friends to get killed, gives himself up to the guards, tells them his name is Hyde and they take him away to the palace, telling him he is a prince.

Jekyll discovers that he is a spirit that possessed the body of the prince after the prince had been slain in military combat (he had always thought it was Hyde who possessed him) and upon returning to the palace Hyde comes out and retakes his rightful place on the throne.

Meanwhile Garth takes one for the team as he uses the power of his curse to perceive for miles and miles and follow Jekyll through the darkness, he suffers greatly because of this, but he doesn't want to lose Jekyll to these drow.

When the rest of the group arrive at the palace they see dead drow everywhere, blood on the walls and a child hiding in a wardrobe. He tells the group that it is because of Jekyll/Hyde who the group find sitting in the throne room and all begins to emerge about Jekyll's true story.

Hyde was meant to be on the throne in the realm of the drow, his family however were fighting over the throne and not wanting him as Prince sent him away to the military in the hopes he would get killed, he did. Jekyll takes over Hyde's body, unknowing that he is the actual demon and lives his life unaware of what is truly going on. Upon his return to the dark elf realm. Hyde slays the drow, killing two of his sisters and one of his brothers, however more siblings remain who are not in the realm.

The baby pulls some weird magical shit, keeping Hyde at bay and turning Jekyll's curse mark into that of a crown Jekyll hears a warning in his head, The powers of Hyde can only be used five times, after that he will take over fully and take what is rightfully his.

The group head down to the basement of the palace where it just so happens a portal to the northern most plane lies. From here we must go to the gates of hell...and make sure that they remain closed

DND Norse: The Roleplaying Session Now On Youtube

Session Description to come once I find myself the words to descirbe this session of roleplaying roleplayiness....roleplay.

This playlist can describe it much better than I can, but I'll describe it anyway...cus I have nothing better to do
http://www.youtube.com/playlist?p=53161B9BB343BCC4

Tiefling Future- Latest MP3

Probably one of the most embarrassing sessions I ever had near the end....DAMN YOU TIEFLING FUTURE PARTY!
You can listen to the session here in this playlist.
http://www.youtube.com/playlist?p=7ECADF1C46D68FD3


If you Also want to hear what happened during our intermission
http://www.youtube.com/playlist?p=7A6D2796699FB55A

Tiefling Future: Saving The Raven Queen

Last Time (I know I didn't write a summary last time, due to being busy) on Tiefling Future the group having saved Bahamut decided they better live to their word and help Lolth out. Now that they had a drow slayer in the party, they really didn't have a choice, as his number one priority was save Lolth. The group went to the frost-claw mountains where they encountered Austrian ice men who made bad puns and took them to their leader. The group were taken to a Revenant, by the name of Alexander whom the original members of the group would know to be the man who sent them after the star in the first place and is the reason they are in this apocalyptic future. Alexander and the group came to a reasonable decision and he allowed them to save Lolth, whom was trapped in his mountain cavern. This made Ryltar a very happy drow...after killing ice men on the moutain because he got too impatient and thought Lolth was somewhere else. Needless to say once Lolth arose Ryltar was happy and had made it a priority to make sure that his fellow party members will be smited by Lolth after their quest is complete.

And now...our feature presentation. The group continued and decided The Raven Queen was best, all apart from Korgul who was like "You know what guys, I'm gonna make my own army, and we're gonna be ten times stronger then yours" Upon which the group beat him up, took some of his money and used the psion to wipe his memory up to the point where he had come to the future. They then decided to travel on without him. The group were stopped during their travels as they encountered a sand storm across the sand dunes of the desert, which to their surprise shifted form into that of a sand genasi. The genasi was not pleased as the group had startled a bunch of sand golems!

The group fought alongside the Genasi in a slight struggle against the golems. With their surprising reach and ability to conjure sandstorms the group were taken by surprise by the giant sand creatures, but eventually managed to thwart the threat and find themselves a new ally in Emere the Genasi (played by Meta)

After the group intoduced themselves to Emere and vice versa, and explained the situation they were in. Emere found it his duty to help Mephistopheles, because well... Mephistopheles is a dick...

The group came upon the town of Vestivia where The Raven Queen had been buried alive in a graveyard. The town however was baron and destroyed with only the sound of insane laughter echoing throughout it. Upon entering the graveyard the group saw that the laughter was coming from a not so sane Necromancer who strangely sounded like Torgo from Manos: The Hands of Fate (I always do the torgo voice for people who are crazy in my sessions...I'm surprised the group are still surprised when they hear it)

Turns out Torgo the Necromancer is trying to sotp people from saving the Raven Queen, because he finds her pretty and well...He doesn't want to let her go. Styx the Paladin of amazing charismatic abilities decides diplomacy and bluff shall fool this Necromancer...and it does. After convincing Torgo Necromancer that The Raven Queen will remain where she is and the group are actually followers of The Raven Queen (Styx is wearing a cloak of the raven queen) Torgo Necromancer lets them into the tomb of The Raven Queen.

What followed makes me wish that I had ended it there, because I had decided to give the group an encounter against three death kin skeletons which I had customised to make a challenge for the group. I thought that, seeing as the skeletons relied on each other, they could use strategies and tactics and be a decent challenge. What happens? The group gets the best rolls they've ever had in the entirety of the campaign and wipe out the skeletons within TWO ROUNDS. Leaving me an embarassed DM looking for Revenge...don't be surprised if you guys randomly run into a dragon next session...

You can watch DND Campaigns I'm not Even In!

Yes, that's how weird I am. Linking you to audio that you can listen to. I was not a part of this session, but i shall keep listening to the recordings. As I sense hijinks ahead.
You can listen to the Friday, yet to be named campaign here.
http://np3228.blip.tv/file/5026897/

DND: The Flight of Dragons 9Due to campaign switcharoo)

Sunday, DND Norse was supposed to happen, but Faust the DM was unable to DM on the sunday, so I gladly gathered maptools and built to carry on with what happened last Sunday, if you're not sure what happened. Don't worry you can find the recap here: http://thebardisdead.blogspot.com/2011/03/dnd-flight-of-dragons-paragon-campaign.html

Carrying on form their decision, the group wanted to lay siege on the city of Athena! Bardeil being the diplomatic one decided that negotiation was the first and bets option, if that did not succeed they would swoop in with the dragon, Caesar and make an aerial attack. Raz and his army of holy men waiting on the outskirts of the city for a signal or a message to tell them what would happen next...

Bardeil was successful in her negotations, how? Well with the help of Regden and the favor of Lolth (she bears a symbol of Lolth as does Hennen after the incident with Hades) Bardeil took Nero, the old Lord out of the city and the group killed him and removed his ears. They were presented to the drow by bardeil as Regden, being a druid had turned into a swarm of spiders, swarming Bardeil to make it look as if they favored her...and drow being lovers of spider's obviously found this intriguing.

So came the decision for the town who would take over Nero. Bardeil decided that it should be her, before the incident with the drow occurred she had been lady of Athena and wanted to regain her power. She managed to convince the drow of many things, but the drow now had to put her through a ritual. A pint of blood would be drawn and offered to a magically linked statue of Lolth. If Lolth accepted Bardeil as leader, the statue would erupt with a swarm of spiders. If the statue rejected her it would burst with a cloud of darkness.

The ritual took place and Regden had decided, just in case to remain in spider form and went ahead to the church of Lolth and waited inside the mouth of the statue. To both Regden's and Bardeil's shock though. The statue accepted Bardeil as swarms of spiders erupted from the mouth. Bardeil, looking at the statue, could swear at one point he saw Lolth smiling at him, before it returned to it's normal state.

So the plan was devised. Bardeil would tell the drow army of Athena that Raz the Righteous and his rebels were in a cave and that it would be important if he were eliminated immediately. What occurred next was an ambush. Regden told Raz and his army of the plan and he and the rest of the group waited outside the cave, while Bardeil stayed in the city to make it look as if she didn't know what was about to go down.

The encounter was long and hard fought, as twenty of the drow army marched to the cave, ten fought by the group, ten by Raz and his army separately so the group didn't have so many to deal with. In game time the encounter was only 42 seconds. However so much shit happened that it would have been the most unrecordable encounter ever. Hennen being the crit meister he is was killing like a mad man. Even on crit fails, fate managed to make it so that he rerolled his d20 to get a good outcome and with all my attempts to thwart hi efforts. He was the biggest damage dealer of all.

The rest of the group were being attacked by snipers, battle wights, inquisitors and an aracanist. The arcanist was the first to go down. However the group were fearful as an old enemy came onto the fields...drow poison (those unaware of drow poison and it's effects it is like this. If hit, you take -2 to attacks until you save, if you fail to save once, you are also weakened, fail to save again...and you are knocked out for the rest of the encounter) Many members of the group were hit, but relentlessly they saved and fought on, until they could save no longer. As the drow numbers diminished, so did the group's health. Regden, Erevan and Shamash fell unconscious in combat, due to the drow poison and the attacks of the drow right near the end.

In the end however the group were successful, tired, worn out. They decided it best to gather loots and find out what had to be to be done next in the war they had become a part of. Raz told them they needed alliances and were given the choice There were the human slaves, if rebellion were caused, they could gather the slaves on their side and boost their numbers. There were the dwarves, forced to mine resources in the mountains for the drow. The elves and eladrin could be contacted through the feywild and brought to the mortal planes, however they are in the throws of civil war. Then there are the dragonborn, tribes split up across the empire. And last...the Treeflings, the people of Regden, camping out in the forests, remaining neutral, remaining safe. So their race does not die out.

The group decided it best to head to the feywild, end the civil war...and take it from there. To get to the feywild though they would need to open a portal and the only place where a scroll could be found lay in the ruins of the city of Alicia. Probably filled with insane creatures and drows...and a danger to anyone who ventured there, but the group is brave and want their world back to the way it was...deciding next session they would find the scroll...head to the feywild...and end the civil war.